有時候我們愛上一個人,是因為不知道自己是第三者;但有時候,我們卻允許自己當第三者。
因為無論我們是別人情人的情人,還是自己有情人以外的情人,這種不用負擔的愛,就像是在外縣市出差旅行亂丟垃圾的輕鬆心情,不用負責任,可以 短暫衝刺自己最有魅力的一刻,或是,盡情表現最醜陋的一面。
有時候我們愛上一個人,是因為不知道自己是第三者;但有時候,我們卻允許自己當第三者。
因為無論我們是別人情人的情人,還是自己有情人以外的情人,這種不用負擔的愛,就像是在外縣市出差旅行亂丟垃圾的輕鬆心情,不用負責任,可以 短暫衝刺自己最有魅力的一刻,或是,盡情表現最醜陋的一面。
現在一天到晚聽到單身的朋友問:「幫我介紹好男人、好女人吧!」
遇到男生這麼問,我會開心的說:「好啊!我認識很多好女人!」遇到女生這麼問,我總是沈默很久,尷尬的跟她講:「我好像沒認識什麼單身的好男人可以介紹。」
於是我在想,到底是我男生朋友認識的太少,女生朋友太多,還是我對男女的標準不一樣高?但是既然要介紹給朋友,當然是要拍胸脯掛保證的好,我才敢介紹,有很多女生我可以大聲的拍胸脯說:「她真的很好!要是我是男生一定追她!」但是要我用名譽拍胸脯保證「這個男生真的很好,要是我單身我一定也要追他」的男生,我居然要努力想很久...
我的朋友喬伊絲問我:「妳曾經深愛過一個人嗎?」
對於這題目,我愣了一下,然後斬釘截鐵回答:「是。」
接著,喬伊絲問:「如果妳仍深愛著他,又不能在一起,妳該怎麼忘記他呢?」
「唔,需要時間吧,或者遇到另一個更深愛的對象。」
The Johari Window is a large square divided into 4 quadrants. Each quadrant represents a different kind of personal information.
Look at the top left quadrant, the one with the word Open in the middle. That quadrant represents the information that we know about ourselves and that also is obvious to others. For example, when you see someone you absorb all kinds of important information about them: their gender, approximate age, skin colour, if they appear to be fit and healthy or not. You might also notice if they are wearing a wedding band, which might mean that they are in a committed relationship. If you talked with them, you might be able to determine if English is their first language, or even if they are from the prairies or somewhere else in Canada. All of this is information for which there is no privacy at all. Simply in the way we look, how we speak, what we wear lets others know something about ourselves.
The quadrant labelled Hidden represents personal information that is known only to us: our life experiences, our thoughts, feeling, dreams…all of that information is within you and it is this information that we share with others. We’re always making decisions about how much of this information we disclose to others. For example, you probably share much more of your “hidden” information with your partner or a close friend than you do with a colleague, and likewise, more with a colleague than you would with a new acquaintance. This hidden aspect of ourselves is the piece we’re focussing on when we talk about self-disclosure. But, the other quadrants are also important, because they also tap into personal information that influences relationships.
The quadrant labelled Blind refers to information that others know about us, but that we don’t know about ourselves. That may seem funny. You might be asking yourself: “How could someone know stuff about us that we don’t know?” If you think about it, you will realise that it happens all the time. Others pick up information about us that is blinded to us. For example, a colleague may point out to you that you drum your fingers on your knee when you’re bored in a meeting. That could come as a surprise to you. If you were not award that you did that, then that would fall into the category of Blind information. Now that you know that about yourself, you will probably notice it the next time you’re sitting in a meeting and drumming your fingers because you are now aware of it. Does it matter? Well, actually, it does matter because knowing that means that it has shifted from being Blind information to being Hidden information and you are able to control it if you wish.
The last quadrant titled Unknown refers to personal information that is known to no one—not even ourselves. It is information that is outside of our awareness but still may affect how we think, feel, and behave. Sometimes this type of information is called unconscious material, and what this means is that we can’t get conscious access to it. Some psychologists believe that everything that happens to us, indeed, all of our experiences somehow shape us. But, we are not always able to remember those things, especially the experiences we had in infancy or before we developed language and sophisticated thought. So that information gets stored in our memories and we don’t realise that it is even there. You might want to think of this as the mystery piece that may shape or influence who we are as individuals.
◎ 何謂強迫症?
強迫性精神官能症簡稱強迫症,是屬於焦慮症的一種。
罹患強迫症的人會陷入一種無意義、且令人沮喪的重複的想法與行為當中,
但是一直無法擺脫它。強迫症的表現可以自輕微到嚴重,但是假使症狀嚴重而不治療,
可能摧毀一個人的工作能力,或在學校的表現,甚至連在家中的日常生活都有問題。
樂觀與憂愁:射手座人的內心不是外表看上去那麼樂觀的,因為喜歡看的遠,容易擔憂的事情也就多,在他們的字典裡,即使現在好,也不一定代表未來好,有時候很多人覺得很好的一個工作或一個伴侶,他們很輕易的就會放棄掉,可能只是因為一個毫不起眼的小原因。所以,這樣的外在表現,就讓人們覺得他們不喜歡被某件事情或某個人束縛住,追求 自由的,沒有壓力的感覺。
現實:常說射手座是追求夢想的人,但往往忽略了他們現實的一面,算計起來不會比處女座差哦,只是更高明更隱藏罷了。射手座人的夢想是必須建立在現實的基礎上的,一般他們很少談及自己的夢想,而是實際的去做一些向夢想靠攏的事情。如果可以借巧力完成的事情,決不會多花一點工夫。所以有時候射手座也容易給人耍小聰明的感覺。可是,不得不承認他們完成的還滿不錯。也許終其一生,他們都在考慮怎麼巧妙的做一些事情,花最少的精力去達到最好的效果。所以,很多射手座看上去讓人們會覺得很懶,但是其實他們的大腦可沒有停下過思考現實的事情。
拒絕低俗:幾乎所有的射手座內心都是驕傲的,其程度絕不亞於獅子座。只不過他們不會顯現在臉上,外在的表現總是隨和的,恰當的。可是內在有著極強的自尊心,敏感也情緒化。因為射手座人心中是驕傲的,所以他們拒絕低俗,不喜歡任何俗氣的、粗魯的事或人。如果可以,他們希望一切有關的事物,都是優雅的、高尚的,值得品味的。而真正能讓他們覺得值得交朋友或談戀愛的人是很少的,雖然表面上他們是很隨和的。
白羊嗎?太恐怖了﹗他們脾氣大、暴力、瞧不起人,還是躲遠些、小心為妙﹗”
如果你這末認為,那你可能就會失去一個肯為你付出生命的人。受火星的灼燒,白羊決不是人們想像中的那種冷血狂魔﹗
白羊的內心世界有兩個︰恨的世界與愛的世界。白羊的外顯世界與內心世界是同步的,只不過由於他的“恨”意更昭顯,以至於掩蓋了他愛的那一面。
白羊很善良,心中總是想著別人,很多時候願意委屈自己而成全別人,但由於白羊不能掩飾自己的情感,凡事爭鋒,有什末不滿就會立刻表露出來,於是不能將美事做
盡, 落個徹底的好人,反而最後還招來一鼻子灰﹗比如,白羊想看愛情連續劇,你想看科教片,於是你們就開始為了看什末而打假。如果你硬看科教片,則白羊會大吵大 罵,最後“砰”的把電視給關上﹗白羊心裡想,電視又不是你一個人的,憑什末只許你看不許我看?﹗你不讓我看,你也別想看﹗但如果白羊占了上風,看上了愛情 連續劇,而你默默的走開,則白羊一會兒又會覺得過意不去,心疼你,怕你不高興,於是讓你看。一句話,白羊是重形式不重實質,極度不能容忍別人挑戰他的威 權。
天蠍,生於秋深。性喜靜,意清幽。愛之切,怨亦深。本質輕名利,但擁有成名得利的天賦。
偏重靈與肉的完美結合。直覺力之準之銳,行動力之瀟灑之特,常令徒有虛表之人忌憤不已。
天蠍,一個別具一格的星座。格調分明有別常人,心胸高妙不露於表。常容人難容之事 ,亦笑人可笑之處。
18歲至28歲
一、多讀書,多思考。其好處到你25歲以後會逐漸顯現。知識才能改善命運,而老公只能改變你的生活,你可以是知識的主人,但你只是老公的配偶。
二、爭取考入一個起碼二流的大學,當然一流最好。讀大學的時候不要錯過談戀愛,更不要錯過一切可以自我表現和鍛鍊的機會。
相信每個人在初嚐愛情的甜蜜後...
都有種原來愛情是如此美妙...
怎麼遲至此時此刻才碰觸到它...